Formerly the71stgalapagosgarrett

 

borinq:

tumblr should have a status thing that tells you how many of your followers are currently online so you know the right time to post a selfie

satans-advocate:

sext: i want to pay bills and share household duties and approach our late 20’s in a financially and emotionally stable way with you

alyreandalute:

a few years ago i trained my dog to respond to harry potter spells and i was just wondering if he still remembered them so i looked at him and said “avada kedavra” and he rolled over and played dead

(Source: hedylamar)

imsirius:

Fawkes is a phoenix, Harry. Phoenixes burst into flame when it is time for them to die and are reborn from the ashes. 

imsirius:

Fawkes is a phoenix, Harry. Phoenixes burst into flame when it is time for them to die and are reborn from the ashes. 

helloser:

tardis-are-y0u-drunk-again:

fairytalefaker:

Do you know the horrors that happened where you’re standing?

Life goes on, strange isn’t it?

i really like this

Read & Laugh! The Most Hilarious Breakup Texts

whyarenogoodusernamesavailible:

foodluxury:

notorious-posts:

definitionofdisney:

Ouch… There’s nothing worse than breaking up over text, except receiving a Breakup Text like these. Lol at the girl in #4, she gets put in her place. See them:

These people are such assholes haha. I can’t stop laughing lmao

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They keep on getting funnier as you go on!

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lmfao #2 and #7.

"I’m standing behind you in the bar asshole"